Tom Keefe

Spirited Communication

Author: Tom Keefe (Page 1 of 6)

My high school ID

Why I’m skipping my 50th high school reunion

July 21, 2026 / / 0 Comments

As if I need reminders that time marches on, in two weeks I celebrate my 68th birthday—and that weekend, former high school classmates will gather for a 50-year reunion.

My high school classmates and I prepare for the annual 2-mile run. I’m standing to the right of the coach.

I’m not attending the reunion mostly for financial reasons (I’m looking for work and can’t justify the travel expenses). I’ve only made a handful of these high school reunions over the years, and have kept in occasional touch with three of my former classmates.

Since graduating high school and college, my 40-year career in communications has mirrored the good and bad of the U.S. economy: Promotions, bonuses, challenging work; but also downsizing, unemployment and lately, ageism.

By the world’s standards, I’ve led an ordinary life. My wife and I are still married after 37 years (unless I blow it between now and October). We have a son who has built a solid career as an electrician in Nebraska and a daughter who is completing her Master’s Degree and excels in her full-time job at the University of Arizona. We have three grand-dogs who keep us amused and busy.

Some of my former high school classmates retired long ago. I want to keep producing quality work for at least a few more years. By skipping the reunion I won’t feel like I have to explain why retirement isn’t the right option for me today.

The conversations at past reunions I attended centered mostly around retelling stories of the “glory days,” and assessing each other’s successes in work and life. The 68-year-old version of Tom has a much more sober appraisal of what is important in life. I don’t regret my high school past but I have moved on.

It probably does not surprise many that even though Quigley Preparatory Seminary North was a Catholic high school serving as a feeder pipeline for the priesthood, at past reunions none of my former classmates seemed interested in talking about faith and their thoughts on spirituality.

I can see the eyes rolling if I would start a conversation about faith and what happens when we die. I get that most people don’t want to think about dying, but it is a fact of life.

My Christian faith has deepened significantly over the past two decades. In recent years, I’ve paid particular attention to the message Jesus gave to his disciples:

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’ (Matthew 7:21-23, New International Version).

That is a warning from Jesus to so-called “believers” that lip service and religious activity won’t save anyone. Salvation in the kingdom of heaven requires an authentic, personal relationship with God and obedience to His will.

I grieve that former classmates may be in danger of eternity in hell, and they don’t believe that is a possibility. We all make choices that define our lives and legacy. Life is too short to ignore the important things and spend time on the superficial.

That’s a message I would want to share with my former classmates, but I don’t think it would be received well.

Weather Choices and Consequences

January 18, 2025 /

It’s been 18 years since I posted about the disbelief of me and coworkers in Illinois upon hearing that a light snow and ice event in Portland, Ore. led to the temporary emergency closure of our office there.

I thought about that post today while my daughter and I walked our three dogs in beautiful 63-degree weather in Arizona. My wife earlier today told me that friends in Illinois were bracing for a cold snap that was punishing a wide swath of the United States.

These were the same friends who questioned our decision to move last summer to Arizona and endure temperatures that regularly exceeded 100 degrees.

Life is about choices, and every choice comes with consequences and requires adjustments. People endure consequences of their decisions where to live and work—including the thousands impacted recently by the California wildfires.

I still make choices regarding work, family life, faith and personal challenges. The choices have narrowed and become easier to discern over decades of living and commitments I have made. But every year brings new choices that stretch me.

This blog and its predecessors have allowed me to trace the journey that life and my choices put before me. I don’t document that journey often enough, but like a gorgeous, sunny January day, I feel grateful when opportunity and creativity come together to birth another post.

Considering the right of abortion

September 18, 2024 /

Legalized abortion in the United States has been a contentious and polarizing issue for more than 50 years. In the aftermath of the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade in the Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization case, it has become a top issue in elections from the U.S. President to local state and county offices.

Abortion defined
Merriam-Webster defines abortion as “the termination of a pregnancy after, accompanied by, resulting in, or closely followed by the death of the embryo or fetus: such as a: spontaneous expulsion of a human fetus during the first 12 weeks of gestation b: induced expulsion of a human fetus.
“Abortion.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/abortion. Accessed 18 Sep. 2024.

Abortion in my life
My wife and I experienced abortion in the early 1990s. It was the “natural kind,” meaning that we didn’t want it to happen, but something went wrong. Doctors would call the 2-1/2 month-old a “fetus.” We called it our baby, and I felt deep loss.

Of course, the controversy today is over abortions where a parent decides to terminate a pregnancy where the baby/fetus is otherwise viable. People who are pro-abortion focus mainly on the right of a woman to make medical decisions that impact her body. People who are anti-abortion see the unborn life as having an innate right to survive.

When society considers the “right” of abortion, we make legal and moral judgments. Should individuals have the legal right to end a pregnancy? Is the life within a woman more than a mass of developing tissue?

I wept for the loss of a child 30 years ago. I weep today for the people who have made a difficult decision to have an abortion. I mourn the loss of so many potentially impactful lives that were cut short.

When I complete my ballot this year for national and local candidates, their views on abortion cannot be my only litmus test. Our nation is struggling in many areas, and we face many issues that require true leadership to tackle.

I will vote because that is both a right and a responsibility in the United States. No political party has consistently demonstrated commitments to every ideal I hold dear. So I will judge each candidate on the totality of their background, ideas and accomplishments.

As you consider your votes, will you struggle like I do with making decisions based on not only what is “best,” but what is “right”?

Do ‘Bad Leaders’ Exist? Oh Yes!

August 6, 2024 /
Tom Keefe delivers a presentation on leadership.

Tom Keefe delivers a presentation on leadership.

I had just finished delivering a leadership workshop, when one attendee asked me a question about a topic that clearly troubled her.

“Is there such a thing as a ‘bad boss?'” she asked.

During the workshop, I showed a series of photos of famous people, and asked the audience to pick the ones whom they considered leaders. Most of the audience also identified “bad leaders”—including Kim Jong-un and Al Capone.

Bad leaders certainly exist! They differ from ineffective leaders, who lack the skills or character to lead a team to the best outcomes. It is possible to redirect and reeducate ineffective leaders to become more effective, more empathetic, and more focused on team success. However, bad leaders lack the desire or capacity to see their deficiencies, and they ignore input from their people.

If you want to avoid becoming a bad leader, assess your leadership style and use a 360-degree evaluation to receive feedback from your manager and the person(s) who report to you.

Some well-known assessments include:

Forgetting Corporate History

July 27, 2024 /
Mergers and acquisitions too often lead to breaks in the chain of corporate history.

We sometimes talk about the impossibility of being completely honest by asking questions such as, “Have you ever taken a paper clip or pen from work? If so, you are a thief!” But during business mergers, acquisitions and liquidations, something much greater is lost: corporate history.

I’ve worked at a couple of organizations that completed one or more mergers or acquisitions. After talking with some people who were “merged” or “acquired,” I got the impression that one of the most disappointing aspects for them was seeing how their company history no longer seemed relevant or useful to their new leadership.

This photo was taken more than 20 years ago to commemorate the expansion of a paper machine at the Fort James Corporation Savannah River Mill near Rincon, GA. I came across it recently when I cleaned a closet in my home office. It would have been tossed into a dumpster long ago if I had not decided to keep it years before.

The photo was sent in the late 1990s to Fort James executives in the Deerfield, IL headquarters, and soon found its way to the company’s Corporate Communications Department, where I worked. As with many such photos and trinkets from corporate events, the photo was displayed prominently for a short time, and then moved into a storage closet.

We came across it early in 2001 following Georgia Pacific’s acquisition of Fort James. We were packing material to send to the GP communications staff. But they didn’t want the photos we had collected. Their focus was on GP; the history of Fort James was not important enough to worry about at the time.

As we disposed of our files that were not wanted by our GP counterparts, I came across this photo. The consensus of the communications staff was that GP would not care for it. I liked the image, was impressed by seeing these large machines in action, and asked to keep the photo. No objections from my manager, so I kept that piece of company history alive for a time.

Corporate history is so much more than old photos and files. Think of the “institutional knowledge” that walks out of companies when someone retires, leaves for a new company, or dies. Operational playbooks can help cover the knowledge gap, but usually not without a degree of confusion and mistakes.

Are those who forget corporate history doomed to repeat it? Not always, however productivity and competitiveness can be hampered by employees and leaders who “don’t know what they don’t know.”

Communicating as a Leader

July 26, 2024 /

A leader demonstrates certain traits that strenthen their ability to attract and develop people within their sphere of influence.

My career included time reporting to a boss who was not a leader. Let’s call him “Dave.” He cared about protecting his job, which meant Dave’s management decisions were based on self-interest and self-protection. The people who reported to him had limited ability to advise and persuade Dave to be more caring to the people impacted by his decisions. I left the organization when I could no longer stomach the situation.

Contrast that boss with a coworker who, while not a boss, was a true leader. Let’s call her Mary. I was in awe of Mary’s ability to cast a vision for what needed to be accomplished, know her weak areas (and convinced others to fill the gaps) and empower her teammates to take action to make a difference.

What made Mary a “leader” and kept Dave from being considered one?

A leader demonstrates these three traits, among others. These traits help them communicate more effectively as a leader.

  1. Authenticity.
    Communication Consultant David Grossman says: “Leading authentically isn’t about being like someone else. Instead, it’s about knowing yourself and being who you are.”

    Employees want a leader who is real and is aware of (and honest about) his or her strengths and weaknesses. They don’t want a leader who’s like a Hollywood movie set—well-packaged on the outside with nothing behind it on the inside.

    This authenticity is as much about words as it is about actions. It is about you to the extent that you’re demonstrating who you are, your values, and the higher purpose you serve. All of that will benefit your audience—the very people who are working to achieve your organizational goals.
  2. Be it; don’t “strut it”
    Certified Professional Co-Active Coach Mary-Ellen Hynd said a real leader is “someone who people follow willingly. It’s not about power and it’s not about position.” (We know who is the boss!)

    LISTEN! (be transparent, foster open communication, check for understanding)

    Which begs the question: How do you get people to follow you willingly?
  3. Motivate and inspire
    I learned important lessons from people who understood not to belittle or speak down to staff. These leaders always seemed to find something to cheer about in their staff’s performance, even when correcting or questioning.

High levels of trust in leaders correlate with higher employee engagement and positive business results. It also improves retention because people don’t usually leave organizations, they leave managers.

Book Review: The Sacredness of Secular Work

July 23, 2024 /

This was the prevailing view when I was growing up of what eternity in heaven would be like: We would all float around on clouds playing harps.

No wonder why so many weren’t excited about going there. It seemed so boring!

Imagine my excitement when reading Jordan Raynor’s book, “The Sacredness of Secular Work.”

In his book, Raynor clearly connects the purpose and importance of our work today with our purpose and place in heaven for eternity. In doing so, he gave me an “aha” moment just as powerful as the opening line of, “The Purpose Driven Life.” (Remember, “It’s not about you.”?)

Raynor aligns with the Faith and Work Movement, which serves Christians in corporate campuses as one of the largest global networks of workplace fellowships. F&WM serves more than 135 of the largest publicly traded companies through networks in strategic cities, including New York, Chicago, San Francisco. Silicon Valley, Singapore, Manila, and Dublin.

The F&WM site states, “We exist to positively impact companies that impact the world and to help Christians in the marketplace to bring their best self to work. We do this by honoring God at work, encouraging one another, loving our coworkers the way Jesus would if he had our jobs, and praying for companies, leaders, each other, and our cities.”

Raynor stays true to the purpose of the F&WM by combining research, scripture and storytelling to show how our individual and collective work honors God now. But he goes further by laying out a case that:

  • Your work matters for eternity even when you aren’t using it to directly advance the Great Commission (“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.”—Matthew 28:19-20 (New International Version)
  • In fact, the Great Commission isn’t the only commission, and it wasn’t the first commission!

After outlining five problems with making the Great Commission our only commission, Raynor summarizes what he terms, “The Abridged Gospel”: “The gospel is the good news that Jesus came to save people from their sins.”

But read how much more expansive and exciting our promised eternal future sounds when Raynor states it as “The Unabridged Gospel”:

God created a perfect world and invited his children to rule over it with him and for him. We sinned, ushering in the curse that broke every part of that perfect creation, ensuring our need for a Savior. Jesus’ resurrection proved emphatically that he is that Savior who saves us by grace through faith. And while we’re not saved by our works, we have been saved for the good works he prepared for us to do all along: partnering with him to cultivate heaven on earth until he returns to finish the job. Then the triune God will finally dwell with us again on a New Earth, where we will rule with him for ever and ever.

That plays out for each of us as uniquely as our gifts, passions and experiences.

I recommend, “The Sacredness of Secular Work.” By the way, its subtitle is, “4 Ways Your Job Matters for Eternity (Even When You’re Not Sharing the Gospel).” The book renewed my desire to honor God daily in the work put before me—and I hope you also find it meaningful and motivational.

“The Sacredness of Secular Work,” by Jordan Raynor. (c) 2024. Published by WaterBrook.

My Least Favorite Day of the Year

April 1, 2021 /

April Fool’s Day is marked by immature and some mean-spirited attempts to prank others. I hate it!

April Fools
Illustration Celebrating April Fools’ Day

Facing Fear and Fire Through Firewalking

July 22, 2016 /

[podcast src=”https://html5-player.libsyn.com/embed/episode/id/4535985/height/360/width/450/theme/standard/autonext/no/thumbnail/yes/autoplay/no/preload/no/no_addthis/no/direction/forward/” height=”360″ width=”450″]

Download Episode!
In June 2016, several participants in a firewalking exercise at a Tony Robbins motivational seminar, were taken to local hospitals after suffering burns.

Why would anyone walk across fire, and how do so many thousands of participants at events like Robbins’ avoid injury?

Stephanie Kurokawa

Stephanie Kurokawa

Listen to this 14-minute with Stephanie Kurokawa, a speaker, trainer and volunteer for Tony Robbins. She has successfully firewalked three times at Robbins’ events, and shares her thoughts on the benefits of the exercise.

Real Freedom

July 4, 2016 /

Independence From AddictionI’m not like many of you.

Today, millions of people in the United States will celebrate the anniversary of the date when our founding fathers in the Continental Congress adopted the Declaration of Independence.

That “Independence Day” often is marked by parades, picnics and parties that include barbecued foods, fireworks and the consumption of beer, wine and other alcoholic beverages. Millions of Americans 12 years of age and older also smoke marijuana, according to surveys including the National Survey on Drug Use and Health. It goes without saying that people will be getting high in many ways today.

But not me and millions of other recovering alcoholics and addicts.

For us, real freedom today comes from avoiding substances that, while pleasurable in smaller doses and infrequent use, led to physical, emotional and spiritual bondage.

Unlike prohibitionists, I don’t support laws that ban alcohol and other drugs. That isn’t freedom either.

Not everyone who will overindulge today is an alcoholic or drug addict. Some are just naïve or foolish about the effects of alcohol and other drugs. However, as someone who has experienced the compulsion to drink and drug, I know that I am not one of the people who can take a few sips of a drink, put it down and forget it.

I’ve had to make adjustments in the 30+ years since my last drink and drug. I’ve regained a spiritual foundation for my life, and have worked to clear the wreckage of my past caused by my addictions.

I speak to groups and individuals regarding my experiences before, during and after addiction. The main point of my talks is that real freedom is something that we have to work for, and at times fight to maintain. The benefits are more wonderful than someone can imagine when under bondage, but those benefits do come true when we work for them.

Happy Independence Day!

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