Spirited Communication

Tag: prank

What is the Big Deal About a Prank? (Part 4)

Why do I dislike pranks? I’m sure that as the fifth of six children in my family, I endured plenty of common pranks growing up.

The only one I remember is when my sister wrapped up coal and gave it to me as a Christmas present.

Yeah, I cried.

But no prank made me cry like that until one pulled on me in third grade. That one hurt.

I had been called up to the blackboard to solve a problem, and was feeling good that the teacher praised me for answering correctly.

I quickly sat but suddenly felt a sharp pinch where my butt met the seat.

I jumped up and twisted to see what caused the pain. A thumbtack hung from my pants. I probably was more confused and surprised than hurt from the thumbtack. What hurt worse was the immediate loud laughter of the boy behind me who planted the thumbtack, joined immediately by a chorus of laughter from what seemed to be every other kid in the classroom.

I felt my cheeks flush and I walked quickly from the classroom as the laughter continued. Somehow I held it together long enough to exit the class, but the tears flooded out before the classroom door shut behind me. I cried loudly as I walked down the hallway, not having a destination, just needing to put distance between me and that situation.

The teacher found me shortly afterward and comforted me. She convinced me to come back into the classroom and made the offender apologize in front of the class. I remember his half-serious, half-smirking face. It seemed like he was only sorry about being disciplined, not for hurting me.

That’s what I see a lot in people who pull pranks. They like the feeling of control, of making themselves feel better about themselves by dragging someone else down. They try to cover up any guilt or consequences by saying things like:

– “Come on, I was only kidding.”

– “Can’t you take a joke?”

– “What a baby!”

– “That didn’t hurt!”

– “You’d better not tell!”

I’ve developed a zero tolerance policy about pranks. I react strongly when someone tries to pull one on me, and make it as unpleasant for them as I can. That makes the “prankster” and anyone watching uncomfortable—which is exactly what I want.

What is the “big deal” about a prank? I hope this series of posts helps you to better understand.

What is the Big Deal About a Prank? (Part 3)

Why do people prank others?

Reasons include:

  • Boredom
  • Desire to control
  • Fear
  • Desire to feel better about themselves

None of the above reasons relate to someone pranking another out of kindness or to improve their esteem. That’s because pranks almost always are tinged with fear and its mean-spirited brethren.

Examples:

  • Putting a sign like “Kick Me” on someone’s back
  • Pretending to be in severe pain or distress
  • Calling someone and asking inane questions
  • Placing something in another person’s path that will trip them, fall on them, or otherwise cause them to stumble or become uncomfortable

The victim of any prank may laugh it off or decide to pull a prank on the instigator or someone else. Neither response is good; the former gives power to the prankster, the latter perpetuates the negative behavior.

I know that “hurting people hurt people,” but no one has the right to make themselves feel better by hurting someone else. That’s the message to give someone who pulls a prank.

Read Part 1 Read Part 2

What is the Big Deal About a Prank? (Part 2)

When ‘Innocent Fun’ Is Neither Innocent, Nor Fun, To Others

In my previous post, I provided background on a prank, pulled on me, that has caused friction within my family.

In my previous post, I provided background on a prank, pulled on me, that has caused friction within my family.

Here is the beginning of the explanation for my reaction to the prank, and what pranksters in general represent to me.

When someone reacts unexpectedly to something that is said or done to them, it could be that the words or actions triggered something. The “fake bleeding” prank that my daughter and wife played on me, triggered several emotions and memories.

A few days prior to the prank, the three of us were reminiscing about a birthday sleepover involving my daughter and some of her friends when they were younger. The girls decided that the first one of them to fall asleep would be pranked by the others. When one girl eventually did fall asleep, Caitlyn moved toward her with a marker, intending to draw on the sleeping girl’s face.

Caitlyn tripped and her face struck an edge of our ping-pong table, near one of her eyes. As blood started to spurt out, Caitlyn and the other girls starting screaming for help.

Imagine being awakened in the middle of the night to the screams of little girls afraid that their friend was going to lose an eye, or worse. My adrenaline kicked in, until it became clear that the wound wasn’t serious enough for stitches. The rest of the sleepover didn’t involve much sleep for me.

My love of my daughter added to the stress of that moment. I wanted to protect her and help her to move past her fear.

The other day, when my wife said Caitlyn had fallen while walking her dog, and I saw what seemed to be a large degree of bleeding from Caitlyn’s face, that same desire to protect Caitlyn kicked in.

When I learned that it was a prank, my adrenaline was still pumping from racing up the basement stairs and taking action to assess and deal with the situation.

It was neither funny, nor fun, for me at that moment.

In my next post, I’ll provide some context for my intense dislike of pranks, drawing from my own experiences.

What is the Big Deal About a Prank? (Part 1)

Why Someone’s ‘Little Joke’ Sometimes Is A Very Serious Matter

An ugly confrontation earlier this week led to strained family relationships and my decision to sleep on the basement sectional the past two nights.

The cause? A prank.

Since March, I’ve been working at home in a contract role for a large employer. The manager to whom I report absolutely requires me to stop each week when I reach 40 hours.

Some additional work responsibilities in recent weeks have stressed me more than usual. I’ve worked long days with occasional short lunch and dinner breaks. Even though I only worked four days because of the Martin Luther King Jr. holiday, I still reached the 40-hour mark.

The following week, which ended today, was even more stressful for various reasons. I was working at a desk in my basement on Wednesday, concentrating on some detailed work, when my wife called down.

“Tom, can you come up? Caitlyn fell on the ice while walking Mickey.”

I hurried up the stairs and saw my wife standing in the powder room doorway. I could hear my daughter running water. When I looked into the powder room, Caitlyn was leaning over the sink. I saw her reflection in the mirror and saw a large amount of blood above her eyebrow and on a towel in her hand.

I asked Caitlyn if she had lost consciousness, and she smirked when she said she hadn’t. I then asked Kim to hand me another towel that I could use to wipe the blood from Caitlyn’s forehead.

My wife asked if we should take her to the hospital, and Caitlyn said no. Then she started to laugh…because she was faking the whole incident.

When I looked at the two of them laughing loudly, I got angry. I swore at them and went back to the basement.

I wish I could say that I fumed for a few minutes and then laughed it off. Or called a trusted friend to vent.

But I was so upset that I instead went back upstairs with the intent of calling them on their poor decision to prank me during the work day when they knew how stressed I have been.

The angry exchanges lasted several minutes. The fallout is still being felt. I slept in the basement over the past two nights because I was too angry at my wife to sleep next to her. I haven’t said more than a few sentences to my daughter for two days.

What made this such a big deal? I’ll explain in my next post.

Maybe We’re Wising Up About April Fools’ Day

Today is one of my least-favorite days of the year.

In the United States and a handful of other nations, it is “April Fool’s Day,” a non-holiday when people play practical jokes and hoaxes on others. It has become a day when companies try to gain some free publicity by disseminating fictitious stories on social media and through traditional media.

Ever since a fellow third-grader placed a tack on my seat, I’ve seen pranks and hoaxes as opportunities for mean-spirited, insecure people to try to make themselves look better by causing someone else to look foolish.

I feel fortunate that coworkers at my current employer don’t play April Fools’ pranks on each other. As I’ve told some of them, I don’t appreciate practical jokes or the people who try them.

How do I feel about companies that use this day to promote themselves through some outrageous activity or message? That depends on how well they execute the message.

The best that I’ve seen today are Redbox’s Petbox and CERN’s “discovery that the Force is real.”

These hoax “news items” are humorous, but not at the expense of others. And some effort was made to support the hoax with fun graphics.

Do you think that I should lighten up, or do you agree that most April Fools’ Day pranks and hoaxes do more harm than good?

Redbox created a spoof "Petbox" ad as an April Fools' Day hoax. No pets were harmed in the making of this spoof.

Redbox created a spoof “Petbox” ad as an April Fools’ Day hoax. No pets were harmed in the making of this spoof.

CERN released a press release stating that its resarchers have used the Large Hadron Collider to confirm the discovery that…the Force is real. Again, I appreciate the humor and the fact that no one's self-esteem takes a hit because of this hoax.

CERN released a press release stating that its resarchers have used the Large Hadron Collider to confirm the discovery that…the Force is real. Again, I appreciate the humor and the fact that no one’s self-esteem takes a hit because of this hoax.

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